I'll never light your eyes up like they should

20050204

pms can be the worst thing in life sometimes. but can be a good thing as well. excuse! hahah. but bad bad was pmsing almost the whole day. and there was shafiqah who was pmsing with me also. i hope she's alrite, she was having cramps. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

i think i was mean to faiz. hahah sorry faiz! pms. yes like i explained to you girls and pms-es

trained shot corners under the terribly hot sun didnt help at all. but i think my pullouts are getting better. must go ask amir teach me! haha.

sigh.. was watching get real when i reached home. it's really sad to see all these bad stuff happening to teenagers nowadays. the episode i was watching was regarding runnig away from home. come to think about it i think that thought never really crossed my mind. i dunno. i guess i always believed that no matter how terrible ur parents might be or unreasonable. there's no reason to run away. dunno la. i guess there's a solution to every problem. and that although we aways think our parents may not understand us. but again how much do we understand them. that's why when mum was telling me about stuff regarding my dad, as in the real dad, i simply cant comprehend what's on his mind. like HELLO only after all these years? so dumb really. i guess that sort of had an impact on my mood. but oh well back to the teenaegrs, ya it's really sad la.

especially malays i think. i mean im not against my own race or anything. although sometimes i am. but it's because it's true isn't it look at the malay youngsters u see on the street nowadays, or commonly and infamously known as the mats and minahs. i mean honestly im really embarrassed sometimes. you might call me stereotpical and stuff but hey im entitled to my own opinions? yes? hahah. ohwell it's like sometimes i feel like they are tarnishing the image of malays. like it's not already bad enough and after that go on and blame the gvernment blame the parents and blame society for being unfair and not givingthem opportunities and all. i mean how i wish they would look at it in a different light - if you try and dont throwthe opportunity given to u like education. hellooooooo malays get FREE EDUCATION youknow?!!?! then i mean with education u can go far instead of lepaking and dont want to study and drop out and stuff. i mean okay im not implying that ITE is bad or second class or anything. but others look at it that way. and well i can safely say that mjority of the students in ITE are malays. most of us understand that some ppl are just not acdemically inclined but say 9 out of10 malay teens end up in ITE or drop outs. can u justify that or as the saying goes "Melayu Bodoh" or issit just plain laziness on our part? i think the last. and also soooooo many malays are constantly breaking the law. dont you feel sad when u read all that inthe papers? i do.

seriously, it's really sad when i think of it. the malays in Singapore how i wish some things change. and by saying all this doesnt mean im a malay who refuse to claim that im malay. like hello im involve in MCS la. since when? hahah.but really one thing im glad is that i've met so many wonderful melayus in VJ andsome from rj. because these are some of the people who prove to be i dunnoo.. different from the malays. like they are different. they think differently from other malays that we see out there. seriously am glad to hae known them. melayu boleh! if only all melayus are like that it'll be wonderful to see like more malays in top jcs, top schools, holding government positions and all. i think it's possible really. i think sometimes we teenagers especilly malays are too troubled.

oh noooooo i dunno wwhat else to say train of thought disappeared.but on my way to be a social worker! wheeeeeeeee

shamphoo let go on 03:53